Like my liveblogging of the RNC speech, this post should not be considered serious commentary on the candidates or their respective policies. It will be sarcastic, disrespectful, probably snide. I'm not trying to be fair; I'm trying to express some incredulity and outrage on this, my personal blog, which functions as a useful outlet for, well, incredulity and outrage. My "partisan" Obama leanings will be evident because I ate the arugula a long time ago...and, since having turned into one by virtue of my East Coast over-education, I just kinda like pointy-headed elitists. So there's the disclaimer: read this as an attempt at comedy, the kind of "laugh so you don't weep" kind, and don't get your panties all in a wad, or your knickers all in a twist (if you happen to be from NZ). And finally, please consider these lists and tallies as works in progress, and feel free to contribute.
1 blown kiss
no observable hip waggles (podium in the way)
4 come-hither eyes, then I stopped counting
1 sexy grin (at least)
nuke-you-ler: at least 6 times.
Folksy Talkin' List
can I call ya Joe [six pack not included]?
Joe Six Pack hearts Hockey Mom (I know that's not verbatim)
"the tax thing"
bless their hearts*
Main Streeter like me
drill baby drill
Man (come on people: can't we all just admit not all of humanity is male, or is that too much to ask, really? and for the record, Biden followed suit on that question, using the term "manmade". Argh, argh, argh. Though I would enjoy pinning the cause of global warming on solely the male half of humanity, I don't think that would really be scientifically accurate.)
say it ain't so Joe
Notable Phrases and Unbelievable Comments
"No, it isn't [correct] but I'm still on the 'tax thing'..."
apparently she can use the word "raping" casually (Anna's observation)
John McCain knows how to win a war (an inside job on Vietnam?)
"the middle class where Todd and I have been all our lives"--um...yeah, I know tons of people who live in governor's mansions. (Actually, I do kind of know someone who used to, now that I think about it...)
can't allow other countries to pollute "more than America will stand for"--wow, well, the whole planet just got dropped in the trash bin, or doesn't she know that America is the world's #1 polluter?
"Talibannie" (the diminutive form of Taliban, apparently. perhaps technically only refers to the young'uns, or maybe just the hotties. Some women just have a thing for beards, after all...)
and my favorite: "where I would lead...with his agenda."
Most Often Heard Outburst from Middle Class Living Room TV Audience
how many get out of jail free cards does she get to play? can't there be a limit to how many times she can redirect a question on anything she doesn't like to energy policy? Gwen Ifill, I demand that you do something about this! Why aren't you doing something??? Oh...I get it...unlimited get-out-of-jail-free was a precondition of the debate, wasn't it...:(